Bert Pretorius7 December 2023 | 10:00

BERT PRETORIUS: We need to conscientise the next generation of men

It may very well be time for institutions like churches to interrogate various traits which have become the bedrock of gender-based violence and femicide, writes Bert Pretorius.

BERT PRETORIUS: We need to conscientise the next generation of men

FILE: It is our responsibility to raise a better-equipped future generation, where males and females are equal and live in harmony alongside each other. Picture: Pexels

As the world observes 16 Days of Activism Against Gender-Based Violence, we are urged to join hands to raise awareness and advocate for an end to this heinous crime.

All of us should pause and ask if there are proactive ways for us to get involved in solving this global pandemic.

We know two things: by the time the criminal justice system gets involved in matters of gender-based violence, which is inherently domestic, the damage is already done.

Secondly, we know that in matters of gender-based violence, the perpetrator is often known to the survivor. In practice, this means a survivor who, according to numerous indices, is likely to be a woman or a girl would find it difficult to go to the police station and lay charges against an uncle, an adopted brother, or even a man of the cloth.

The church is a critical body in society. It is at the heart of society's consciousness. It may very well be time for institutions like ours to interrogate various traits that have become the bedrock of gender-based violence and femicide.

Toxic masculinity and patriarchal practices are rife today.

The term "toxic masculinity" refers to a range of damaging attitudes and actions that researchers have extensively studied. These include suppressing emotions, projecting an image of toughness or emotional detachment, and placing value on violence as a way to assert dominance. Essentially, toxic masculinity promotes the notion that men and boys must always be strong and never display vulnerability or emotion. This can result in harmful outcomes, including the perception that anything outside this framework is "feminine" or feeble.

Patriarchy is a social and ideological construct that considers men (who are the patriarchs) as superior to women. According to Walby (1990), it is a social system in which the role of the male as the primary authority figure is central to social organisation and where males hold authority over women, children, and property.

Over the years, our institution and the gospel have been used to justify toxic masculinity and patriarchal practices, wherein certain biblical teachings are interpreted to mean women are the property of men.

This is amplified in the misapplication of cultural practices, which misrepresents what are well-meaning ideas in some instances. Like all things in society, what we regard as norms must be reconsidered. We simply cannot live in a society where biblical texts and culture are used as justification for gender oppression.

Statistics across the world affirm that a woman who is known to us has experienced some form of sexual violence. There is a solution – we need to conscientise the next generation of men.

The messaging in our communities needs to change. We have to call out this toxic behaviour, no matter where it arises. We must push through the discomfort of confrontation for the sake of humanity.

It is our responsibility to raise a better-equipped future generation, where males and females are equal and live in harmony alongside each other.

Bert Pretorius is a senior pastor at 3C Church, and chairman of Rhema Family Churches.